Let’s face it, some people are just difficult. Mean-spirited, angry, bitter, selfish, and resentful. There’s no telling what has happened throughout their life to dictate this behavior, but there it is, as clear as the nose on your face. And it will happen in this life, that you will meet such persons. There’s no telling where, when, or how, but there is one guarantee in this life, you will have to deal with difficult people. But instead of just grinning and bearing it, or lowering yourself to fight at their level, be aware that there is an art to dealing with these folks. And just like everything other single solution to this life’s problems, God includes it within the pages of His Holy Word.
1 Samuel chapter 25 revolves around the story of one world class jerk, Nabal. He is rich, with over 3,000 sheep and 1,000 goats. To have this many animals meant he also had a lot of land. To have this many animals and this much land meant he also had a lot of servants. Nabal was rich in stuff. But you know there are many kinds of rich. You can be rich in your material possessions, having a lot of junk. You can be rich in your actions, promoting love to your fellow man. You can be rich in knowledge, possessing great intellect in a certain arena. Or you can be rich in your character, possessing a level of integrity that speaks volumes to the world around you. As we will see later in our story, Nabal was only rich in the first. The name Nabal means “fool.” He was either named this from birth or collected it later because of his deserving actions. Nabal’s name is reminiscent of Psalm 14:1, which David wrote. Who knows, maybe David wrote this very verse about Nabal?
“The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." They are corrupt, their deeds are vile; there is no one who does good.” Psalm 14:1
Our story opens with David wanting to feed his men for the upcoming feast day. As he and his men had been fighting the Philistine’s, there were many opportunities for them to protect Nabal’s property, livestock and general welfare. Even though Nabal didn’t now it, David had been showing him great kindness in his protection. David sends 10 men to Nabal to request that he and his men share in the feast at Nabal’s table. It didn’t go well.
Nabal verbally insults David and his men. Nabal, the fool, is ready to say what is on his mind. Nabal the difficult person, is ready to speak his mind freely, not thinking about the damage his words inflict. Nabal, the selfish only thinks of himself. There are many Proverbs that deal with the dangers of living life as a fool. And it seems most of it involves what comes out of the mouths of fools.
“A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.” Proverbs 18:2
“A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.” Proverbs 29:11
“A fool's lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating.” Proverbs 18:6
“A fool's mouth is his ruin, and his lips are a snare to his soul.” Proverbs 18:7
Nabal spews anger, hate, and insult. He refuses to even consider sharing what belongs to him. He has worked hard for what he has, it belongs to him and no one else can just saunter up and ask for some of it. Nabal’s hand held tightly onto what he had. And folks, when you hold on too tightly to what you think is yours, it sure hurts when God takes it from your hand.
Upon hearing this great insult, David erupts into rage. He readies his men, murder on his mind. Now, David was not justified here. Murder, anger, and hate are sins. No matter the situation, no matter how big a jerk the guy is, no matter how severe the insult. As David and his men are riding towards Nabal’s estate with rage consuming them, they meet someone. They meet someone that speaks, sense, logic, calmness, and love. They meet a peacemaker.
“When Abigail saw David, she hurried and got down from the donkey and fell before David on her face and bowed to the ground. She fell at his feet and said, “On me alone, my lord, be the guilt. Please let your servant speak in your ears and hear the words of your servant. Let not my lord regard this worthless fellow, Nabal, for as his name is, so is he. Nabal is his name, and folly is with him. But I your servant did not see the young men of my lord, whom you sent. Now then, my lord, as the Lord lives, and as your soul lives, because the Lord has restrained you from bloodguilt and from saving with your own hand, now then let your enemies and those who seek to do evil to my lord be as Nabal. And now let this present that your servant has brought to my lord be given to the young men who follow my lord. Please forgive the trespass of your servant. For the Lord will certainly make my lord a sure house, because my lord is fighting the battles of the Lord, and evil shall not be found in you so long as you live. If men rise up to pursue you and to seek your life, the life of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of the living in the care of the Lord your God. And the lives of your enemies he shall sling out as from the hollow of a sling. And when the Lord has done to my lord according to all the good that he has spoken concerning you and has appointed you prince over Israel, my lord shall have no cause of grief or pangs of conscience for having shed blood without cause or for my lord working salvation himself. And when the Lord has dealt well with my lord, then remember your servant.” 1 Samuel 25:23-31
Ladies and gentlemen, meet Abigail, a peacemaker. We are told that Abigail was “discerning and beautiful” (1 Samuel 25:3) And we see here that her discerning spirit was as beautiful as her physical features. We have the hard, foolish, difficult heart of Nabal that is about to meet the angry, murderous heart of David…and Abigail steps in between the two. She sees the great wrong that has been spoken by her husband and the wrong that will soon happen as a result of it, and she places herself in the middle of the problem. She sees that David has a heart for the Lord and if he pursues this murderous rampage, he will regret it greatly. She stands in the gap between sin and righteousness. Friends, this is one of the most beautiful examples we see in God’s Word of someone seeking the peace of God at all costs. She tells David, “blame me for my husband’s insult.” She is ready to be found guilty in her husband’s place. An act of sacrifice that seeks peace more than personal welfare. She does not make excuses for her own husband, “he is worthless, and folly is in him.” She does not allow personal connection to alter her honest discernment. But she also doesn’t make excuses for David. “You shall have no cause of grief or pangs of conscience for having shed blood without cause.” She knows David's reaction is harsh and severe. Abigail stands in the gap of conflict. She stands in the way of evil. She proclaims peace.
Friends, today you will experience conflict. It might be in your life or in the lives of those around you. Conflict is never easy, but God shows us the art of bringing peace out of conflict. God calls us to be peacemakers in this world. A command that must be heeded at all cost. As a peacemaker you must be humble, honest, discerning, unselfish, and loving. You cannot seek your own way and make peace. You cannot promote your own agenda and make peace. You cannot benefit one group more than another and make peace. To be a true peacemaker of Christ you must be willing to stand in the chasm of the conflict and promote the principles of Christ. And as you do, the world will see Christ within you. And as the world sees a child of Christ, lives can be changed, one heart at a time.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” Matthew 5:9
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